When a family fosters, everyone is involved — not just the adults. If your parent or carer is thinking about fostering, or already fostering, this page is for you.
We know that welcoming a foster child into your home can be a big change. You might feel excited, nervous, proud, or even unsure — and that’s completely normal. Children who foster play a really important role in helping other children feel safe, welcome, and part of the family.
Page contents
- What is it like to be a child in a fostering family?
- Learning about fostering
- Support and friendships
- Questions about fostering
- Useful resources just for you
- Children Who Foster month
- Got questions? Want to talk?
What is it like to be a child in a fostering family?
Children and young people who foster share their home, time, and sometimes even their parents' attention. That’s a big thing to do — and it's something we truly value and respect. You might:
- Share your toys, space, or routines
- Answer questions about fostering at school or with friends
- Make new friendships with children who stay with your family for a while
- Have mixed emotions about saying hello, and goodbye, to new children
No one expects you to be perfect. We just want you to feel supported, heard, and proud of the role you play in your family’s fostering journey.
Learning about fostering
If your parent or carer is applying to become a foster carer, you’ll be part of the journey too.
During the assessment, you’ll be invited to take part in Skills4Kids — a fun and interactive training session for children in fostering families. It’s a space to:
- Learn about what fostering means
- Talk about how it might feel when a new child moves in
- Share your own thoughts and questions
- Meet other children whose families are fostering
Skills4Kids helps you feel ready, confident, and informed before fostering begins.
Support and friendships
Once your family starts fostering, you’ll be invited to join Surrey’s Children Who Foster Group. This is a friendly support group where you can:
- Meet other children and teens who foster
- Take part in fun activities and events
- Chat about your experiences in a safe space
- Help shape what support looks like for children like you
We run regular meet-ups, creative workshops, and group sessions where everyone’s voice is valued.
Questions about fostering
It’s normal to feel different when your family starts fostering. Maybe things are busier at home, or you’re not getting as much time with your parent. That doesn’t mean you’re forgotten and it’s always okay to say how you feel.
You can talk to your parent or carer, your social worker, or a Children Who Foster group leader
You matter just as much.
Children come into foster care for all kinds of reasons. It might be because their parents are unwell or need help. It’s never the child’s fault. Your job isn’t to fix things but just to be a kind and welcoming part of their new journey.
Every child is different. Some might come from other countries or speak another language. Some might be shy or really active. You don’t have to be best friends, but a friendly smile goes a long way.
That’s okay. You won’t always click with everyone, just like at school or in your neighbourhood. You’re not expected to be best friends, but it’s important to be respectful and kind. Talk to an adult if something’s not working, or if you're feeling uncomfortable or frustrated. Adults are there to help work things out.
That’s a great question. Some things, like family games or shared spaces, might be for everyone. But your personal belongings are still yours, and it’s okay to have things you don’t want to share. Your family will help set fair house rules to keep everyone comfortable.
It depends. Some foster children stay for a few days or weeks, others for months or even years. Your parent or carer might not always know the exact plan, but they’ll keep you updated. It’s okay to ask questions or even to feel sad when it’s time to say goodbye.
That’s a completely normal feeling. Your parent or carer might need to spend extra time helping the foster child settle in. But you are still just as important — and they haven’t forgotten about you. Try talking about how you feel — they’ll want to make sure you feel heard and valued too.
That’s a chance to learn something new! They might speak a different language, celebrate different holidays, or eat different foods. It’s okay to be curious — just be respectful. Asking questions kindly and learning about each other can be a great way to connect.
Useful resources just for you
We’ve put together a few resources to help you understand fostering and how you fit into it:
A Children’s Guide to Foster Care: Has illustrated guides for younger children and teens explain who foster carers and social workers are, and what fostering means in simple language.
Active Care Solutions: Offers advice for everyone in a fostering household, including simple strategies you can use to manage stress, build resilience, and practice emotional self-care.
Mindworks Surrey: Being part of a fostering family can bring up all kinds of feelings — and that’s okay. If you're finding things difficult, you're not alone, and there is help available.
Children Who Foster month
Every year in October, we celebrate Children Who Foster — a time to say a huge thank you to all the amazing children and young people in fostering families across Surrey.
The next Children of Foster Carers Week runs from Monday 13 to Sunday 19 October 2025 and fostering services across the UK will run events and activities to recognise and reward the children of foster carers for the important role they play in their home, making children in care feel happier, welcome, safer and more loved.
We host special events and activities during the school holidays, including:
- Days out and trips
- Celebration events
- Art, writing, or photography competitions
- Opportunities to share your story (if you want to!)
It’s a time just for you — to celebrate your contribution and connect with others who know what it’s like.
Got questions? Want to talk?
It’s always okay to ask questions, say how you feel, or tell someone if something’s not working for you. You can speak to:
- A parent or foster carer
- Your social worker
- Your supervising social worker
You can also email us any questions you have. We’re here to listen.