One couple's adoption story
Published: 19 February 2018
From nights on the town to days out at Legoland
Surrey residents Tim and Matthew* enjoyed a life of socialising, weekends away and holidays. But all that changed when they swapped the restaurants and weekends away for trips to Legoland and afternoons jumping in puddles with their new family. To mark LGBT Adoption and Fostering Week (5 – 11 March) Tim tells Surrey Matters their story.
Wanting a family
"I had always thought about having children, but it wasn't until we had been together for a few years that Matthew and I started really thinking about it as a couple. We explored different options, including surrogacy, but we didn't like the idea that one of us would be the biological father and the other not. It's a personal choice, but for us adoption was the only way forward.
Adopting with Surrey
Once we'd decided on adoption we spoke to a private adoption agency in London, but chose to adopt through Surrey County Council after a really positive meeting with them.
Over the coming months we went on training and matching events. The matching events give prospective adopters the opportunity to hear about the children who are waiting. Then one evening we went to an event that would change our lives forever. One of the women from the adoption team kept looking over at Matthew and I and eventually she came over and asked us to step outside. That was when we heard about our two boys. We knew that it is more difficult to find homes for more than one child and as we'd both grown up in busy homes, we knew we were happy to adopt siblings.
Becoming a family
Fast forward two and a half years our lives have changed completely. Just leaving the house is a military operation. We've had our ups and downs, we've cried and laughed. But we wouldn't change a thing. Our two little boys are our world and we love our little family. Our nights out in restaurants and bars have been swapped for lazy nights in front of the TV and weekends away have changed to day trips to Legoland and fetes.
Support from Surrey
At first our eldest son struggled to attach to Matthew, but the adoption team were fantastic and really helped us. Our social worker organised a theraplay course for us which taught us ways to enhance our attachment and allowed our son to open up and trust us."
Interested in adopting?
If you are interested in adopting a sibling group, a child who has a developmental uncertainty or an older child (over the age of four), contact the adoption team on 0800 096 9626 or visit Surrey County Council Adoption for more information.
*Names changed to protect identities
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